1. And the rains came
2. Yesterday of course the rains came again. When I got home I parked up at the end of the block because of course it was completely flooded at the end of our street. The water was full of splashing muddy kids. I walked around and saw that my neighbor’s back yard was full of standing water and when I looked out at our field there was standing water there as well. Sigh. Once the water is standing in the field our basement doesn’t have a prayer. Oh well.
3. A blog question. If anyone that reads this has a blog with ads on it….can you tell me how much traffic you need to make it worthwhile? I don’t get tons of traffic and I’ve never wanted to do ads but even if it just made a few bucks….it could go to covering the monthly cost of this. I'm kind of wishy-washy but curious.
4. I went to admire my zinnias the other morning and promptly got hysterical about all the Japanese beetles nuzzling their way right into the flowers and chomping. Time to get the soapy water out. At least I'm not battling cabbage worms on my kale like my friend Linda is. Gosh this is scintillating prose----no wonder I don't have more traffic. HA!
5. Congratulations to my friend Dean and his wife Tricia who now have a second beautiful baby girl!
6. I've been thinking about my sister Judi a lot lately. Maybe because we're dealing with setting up the trust for the boys and finally settling her estate. I think in some ways I didn't expect to feel the loss as strongly as I do almost a year and a half after her death. Not that I didn't think I would still miss her and grieve---that will last my whole life....but I guess I'm surprised by how much she is in my thoughts. Trying to keep track of Owen at the City Museum in St. Louis made me laugh thinking it would have given Judi a heart attack---she always worried when she couldn't see them on the playground. And when we watched Toy Story the other night on TV and the boys made fun of how loud my oohs and ahs are in moments of suspense-----I just told them that Judi was even louder when she watched movies and so there! Ernie just nodded and assured the boys that was definitely true. And when Owen came and pulled us out of the house to see the glowing orange sky the other night I asked him if he remembered when Judi called us upstairs to see the pink sunset from her room. Or when I make a recipe I think she would have liked. I loved cooking for her. When I see a scratch on her beloved dining room table I flinch and I shake my head over how messy we keep the inside of her Honda. And sometimes suddenly I just cry. And the other day when her name came up and Ernie dissolved into tears. Wiping his eyes, he said, "your sister.....I'm just not over that" and I knew what he meant.
Perhaps it's because in losing a sibling you lose a part of yourself----in a way different than you do with a parent. We expect to outlive our parents. I don't think we expect to outlive a sibling. Your sibling should always be there----giving you part of your history. Remembering the way Dad would get mad at us if we upset Mom or remembering that our favorite dinner when we were little was when my mom would roll up meatloaf and mashed potatoes and slice it into pinwheels. Remembering the way you could climb up the black drawer handles to sit in the corner of the kitchen counter and how my mother would yell at us for that. Remembering the time we flew to Maine without our parents and flights got canceled and the airlines lost track of us. Remembering eating bread, butter and sugar as a special treat. Remembering all of it.
Maybe that's it.
I miss my mother terribly and still am not used to not having her to call---or to worry about. And I miss my father and his political rants and his completely irrepressible spirit. But Judi...oh man....do I miss Judi.
Recent Comments