O.K.....as you may or may not know we're thinking about putting a small addition on our house so that my mother can live with us. Anyone have a recommendation for an architect in the Champaign-Urbana area that would handle an ummm, MODEST addition to an old house?
We just got back from a successful Labor Day celebration at my mother's house. The parade goes down the street about a half block from my Mom's hosue so we go over there and watch it and then have a picnic kind of lunch. Owen fell asleep on the way home and as soon as he got in the house laid on the couch and said his stomach hurt. Probably all the candy he scrounged from the parade but I forgot about that so when he said, "come here quick Mommy" I scampered in thinking he was going to get sick. He just rolled over to face me and said, "when they say 'from the deepest part of your heart' do they mean they start at the top?
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The other day Owen was showing me something exciting on the Lego Star Wars game and I commented, "gee there's an awful lot of shooting" and he just stared at me and then said politely, "have you SEEN Star Wars?" Uh...o.k....I get your point. Today I was quizzing Leo on the gender of various androids and stormtroopers and finally I couldn't help myself and asked why there was so much fighting. He gave me a dumbfounded looks and said, "Mom.....it's called Star WARS....."
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Sometimes I forget I'm living in a house full of men. Things may change however. This afternoon Ernie and I talked to my mother about selling her house and using some of the money to put a small addition on our house so she could live with us. We've got this goofy bathroom that was added on to the back of our dining room. It don't think it was exactly done by a licensed contractor as the light switch for the light above the sink is in the basement..... Anyway, it seems to me if we enlarge that a bit to the back and then extend it to the other side of the house it wouldn't be huge but it would be big enough for a little bedroom and we could redo the bathroom to make it more accessible for her.
I have to admit it's taken us awhile to get to this point. It will be a big adjustment for all of us and I've put it off for awhile because of my concerns about Ernie's health. But I don't know how long she can live alone but she's not ready for a nursing home yet and since the Prairie Winds debacle assisted living isn't an option either. So Ernie and I have talked about it for awhile---we're trying to look at the whole picture. We told her we'd still want her to have her homecare person come in and help her with bathing and showering, etc. That we'd do dinners for everyone so many nights a week but once or twice a week Ernie and I would eat late on our own or go out to dinner. We would need her to contribute to groceries and things like that but it would ease her monthly costs a lot which she worries about. We're trying to think it all out.
My
parents had my grandfather live with them for several years and I think
it was very difficult for her. She cried a little when we talked about
it---saying she didn't want to infringe on our lives. She said she
knew we liked to entertain and she wouldn't want us to stop. I told
her we wouldn't stop and she could either hang out with the party or
curl up in her room---that we'd muddle through all these issues.
I gotta say the thought of clearing out her house and figuring what to bring etc. would be a huge job. And just as I thought about that her cats walked through the room. Uh-ohhhhhhh. The one thing Ernie really is against but they'd have to come. We laughed a lot as we talked about it and she even promised to get hearing aids if she comes to live with us.
I told Owen what we were talking about----having Grandma come live with us and he thoughtfully said that if we turned our bed sideways in our bedroom that we could fit her bed in there too. Uh...thanks Owen.
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I missed my father at the Labor Day parade. My dad was all for labor.....and at the parade he would stand everytime the American flag passed. When I mentioned yesterday that I would miss grandpa at the parade Owen thought about it and then said, "well, maybe we could bring his picture with us." My sweet pea....
Happy Labor Day all! Here are a few scenes from a wonderful small town Labor Day parade....the ironworkers are always our favorite part----although my Mom is a softie for the high school bands....
O.K....not a great picture but still a rare picture of all three of us....
1. Overall a pretty nice weekend. Didn't make it to the farmer's market but given that I still had some things left from last week it's just as well. Instead I got together with a good friend for coffee and then watched all my boys paint. I let the boys convince me to buy them their first Lego Star Wars sets on Sunday. God knows I am a sucker for those guys.....they showed me what they wanted on the computer and Leo earnestly explained to me that although on the computer they were only $10.99 each it would still be cheaper to go to Meijer where they had seen them for $11.99 each because then we wouldn't have to pay for shipping. So I looked at those big brown eyes gazing at me so hopefully and said o.k. We trotted off to Meijer's and the boys were beside themselves with excitement. All the way through the store and the check out they clutched their little boxes and kept thanking me over and over. Leo told me that I was the best mother in the history of the world and kissed me.
2. After the three guys of the house finished the last coat of orange paint we went over and picked my mother up so we could drive out to the cemetery and see my father's headstone. It was a beautiful day and the stone is beautiful as well. The boys put zinnias from our garden in the little vases and then Owen asked if he could take two zinnias out and put them in front of Grandma Alice's grave. I said of course. Leo even let me take a picture. Look at the size of that head! Guess I need to get him a haircut.
3. Here is my dining room. Woo-hoooooo!
4. I sat and talked with my mother yesterday when we got back to her house. We were talking about my father---she mentioned the time he was stopped in the middle of the night while driving down the wrong side of the highway. She asked when that was and I told her that was in 2004. Then as she traced some other things---her skin cancer surgery and recovery in a nursing home, Dad's prostate surgery and his carotid artery surgery, etc. I said," yeah, that was in 2004." "Really, those were all in 2004?" Yep....and the two huge trees in your yard came down in a storm on the same day as Ernie's prostatectomy. "oh, when was that?" she asked. "2004" I replied. "oh, and Ernie's mother Alice died that year too." She looked at me in disbelief and I said, "yeah, that's the year I started taking antidepressents." We both laughed because that's all you can do.
I mentioned that Dad had not done well while she was in the nursing home that year but that when she was back he was more himself. "He loved you so much....he really needed you" I told her. She nodded and said, "I knew I had to outlive him so I did....and then her eyes filled and she said, "I guess he didn't know how much I needed him."
5. School starts for the boys this week. Do I have their school supplies? Nope. Have I bought clothes for them? Nope. Have I got new shoes for them? Nope. Leo says he doesn't want new shoes. I told him he could not wear shoes to school that had his toes sticking out of them. He said, "well, they only stick out a little."
1. As always guys....thanks for the kind words and support. O.k., o.k., the news at Ernie's oncologist appointment WAS good. The hormones are doing what they should. It's just that sitting there talking about it all brings home the fact that....oh, yeah.... Ernie's got cancer. And it just shakes me up and freaks me out....and then I calm down. So onward.
2. Thanks for the kinds words about some of my pictures too but I must give Ernie credit for some of them. In fact that one you liked so much Sasha, was one of Ernie's. The first evening, when we got to the beach, the most incredible storm blew in. There was a tornado warning for god's sake....not something I expect in Maine.... Anyway----the light and the sky were utterly amazing....minutes after that other picture the sky looked like this so we scurried back to the house....
3. V'ron----the Rose Bowl in Urbana has always been the Rose Bowl to my memory. I know it was when I was an undergrad oh so many years ago. Anybody else know how long it's been around?
5. I had a hard time waking up this morning. I was deep into a dream----yet another one about my grandparents' house in Maine. My mother, Debbie and I were all there trying to clean it out. As often is the case in my dream, the house had been sitting closed up for years since my grandparents had died. As we sorted through things in the kitchen, finding things we wanted to keep, throwing all the old food into trash bags, I talked to Debbie about the fact that even though we were doing this we knew there was no way we could take these things home with us----that we had just driven by the house not that long ago and knew there were people living in it and these things we were looking at were long gone. I woke up feeling rather sad.
6. Not much planned for this weekend....and it's supposed to be dreadfully hot. I'm thinking of shutting ourselves up in our dirty but air conditioned house and doing something mildly productive like the Great Bedroom Shift of 2008 or paint my dining room. OH...and I forgot to tell you all that the house we rented in Maine.....it had orange walls..... Not quite the color I want but quite nice nonethless. HA.
1. Man, I was out of sorts last night. Don't know why. I got home and wanted to treat myself to some time to figure out a new banner for my blog. I don't like any of the standard templates and I assumed I could figure it out. I was wrong. I hated all the pictures I had, got hung up because my damn connection is so fucked up and couldn't figure it out after all. And it's really not important but it drove me crazy. All the kids playing in the yard were irritating me even though they weren't doing a thing wrong. I wasn't upset with anyone or about anything but I just felt frustrated and headachy and grumpy. Ernie tried to be helpful and sympathetic but when he saw our neighbor Rob he brightened up at the thought of friendly company and scurried outside. I sat inside by myself (!) and watched Hell's Kitchen. Every so often the Lego playing creatures infiltrated but I couldn't complain as they were so damn cute. Honest to God, Linda has one of the cutest families I've ever seen in my life and of course I happen to think mine are pretty damn cute too. When Owen saw what he was watching he wailed "Oh, I LOVE this show....can I watch it with you?" and he curled up next me and let me sniff him and kiss the top of his head every so often.
Watching bad tv and having a glass of wine (as well as snuggling with Owen) finally eased me somewhat. I'm worried about my mother and feel like I'm not doing enough for her. I get in these states and the future scares me. Instead of thinking how good most of the present is I get hung up on the future. STOP DOING THAT CYNTHIA.
2. My doctor is increasing my blood pressure medication. Maybe that will stop the headaches I've been getting too. I'll cross my fingers as they sure as hell don't help anything.
3. So what do you think my blog banner should look like? What do you think would represent this blog? Even though I put pictures of the guys up all the time somehow I don't want them on my banner. I haven't been able to bring myself to change my tagline about having elderly parents....I think I'll have to leave it that way. A week from today it will be two months since my father died.
4. Another question to put to a vote: Should Ernie agree to paint the dining room orange? I guess if I were a really good blogger embed a little voting thing. Oh well. Another time....
1. I HATE MY COMCAST connection. Sigh. Sometimes it’s fine but sometimes it SUCKS. Do any of you local readers have alternate internet service you would recommend? This is making me nuts.
2. I love the farmer’s market with all my heart but man it can be expensive. I guess I’m feeling really broke right now as grocery store prices are freaking me out too. Mind you I don’t begrudge the vendors the money----they deserve it and more but I did cringe when I paid $7 for the bag of green beans. All that being said I was pleased with my somewhat restrained haul of beautiful green beans, sweet little baby zucchini, tomatoes, peppered goat cheese and some pork steaks. Oh…and of course chocolate chip cookies for Leo (no nuts mind you) and an ice cream sandwich for Owen.
3. Owen pretty much enjoyed the farmer’s market, particularly when we bought him that ice cream sandwich. Leo, on the other hand, said we walked so much that his legs hurt. Yup, the same guys that races around the neighborhood just couldn’t take walking up and down a couple of aisles. We suggested that as soon as we got home we have him put his feet up and rest, perhaps use a heating pad and drink some liquids to replenish fluids. He just growled at us. It’s really fun to pick on Leo.
4. Farmer’s market highlight: I got to meet LBOTP and elusive peanut(let me just say the peanut is adorable)!
5. I’m thinking of painting my dining room orange. I’ve had a green in there that I’ve never been happy with and I’m thinking orange would work with what is in there as well as the deep gold of my living room. We’ll see….Ernie’s not totally on board yet….
6. I feel SO much better now that my friend Kathleen told me the reason she had snakes in her car was because when she put her lawnmower in there IT had snakes in it. Then she told me that she could smell when they were there and she’d see one down by her feet and then it would slither up behind the dash. EEEEEEEK. It never occurred to me that she continued to DRIVE HER CAR WITH SNAKES IN IT. This is someone I consider a very close friend. I may have to consider.
7. An unnamed cat (I’m thinking it’s Bob) has begun dragging dirty clothes from the pile next to the washer in the basement and up the stairs and into the kitchen. This is the same cat that grabs Lego wheels and takes them downstairs. Huh.
1. Our storm door is old and decrepit and evil children (belonging to us) destroyed not just the screen, but the entire frame of the screen that goes into it in the summer. So I did some research online and we decided to set off to purchase a new storm door. We always feel so adult when doing things like this. I know we should be feeling adult all the time but we just don't. Maybe someday?
So anyway, guess what?
We do not have a standard sized door. It's taller than a standard door. I like having an old house so I can't complain BUT it would have to be custom made and the cheapest we could come up with would be something like $600 with installation. We discovered this while in Lowe's. Lowe's has a strange effect on Ernie and me. It is a rare day we make a trek to Lowe's and do NOT argue. I don't know what it is----there is something about the environment that makes us irritate each other incredibly. Now Menard's does not have this effect on us. So why do we still go to Lowe's? I don't really know....sometimes you have to check out different places....and Menard's is starting to irritate me now that you can buy everything from salad dressing to novels to mattresses there. It's just not right. Anyway...so Lowe's had one more victory as we grumbled at each other and got really frustrated by doors. Grrrr. I guess we're going to try to give the old door a makeover....$600 for something nonessential is not in my budget at the moment. Hell, you've got to have priorities. We'd rather spend our money driving to Maine or bringing our favorite musicans to our house....
2. I'm trying to tell myself that Owen is in the midst of some kind of growth spurt or something. First there were all those growing pains, now he won't stop EATING and he has been incredibly FRUUUUSTRATING of late. He gets tired and whiny and I want to kill him...he thinks everybody is mean to him....things escalate and then all of a sudden he gets it under control and cheerfully apologizes, "sorry about that fussing Mommy." which you gratefully accept but you STILL want to kill him. I'm hoping he gets through this phase quickly.....
3. As some of you know, my blog has brought me great pleasure in not only reconnecting with old friends but also making new ones. Annie is a friend of my sister Judi and I love her and am pleased to know that she reads my blog. She sent me this email recently and I HAD to share it. She wrote:
I hate to admit how proud I am of my new vacuum cleaner, please don't spread it around because I have a reputation as a not-so-fastidious housekeeper. But I was intrigued by the family resemblance between my new Electrolux and my neighbor's car.
4. OH....and I almost forgot---thank you SO much for the appetizer ideas. They are GREAT---keep 'em coming....
ugh......my indoor cats have fleas and this morning I found three fleas on me. Biting insects like fleas and mosquitos adore me....evidently I am particularly tasty. We've treated the cats but now we have to figure out how to get them out of our house. I don't like to use horrible toxins around the guys....any ideas anyone?
Of course this goes on the list with the leak in the bathroom ceiling (oops, it's raining....) and all the other things around the house we need to deal with. I just don't have the energy for everything these days....
On another note....I love my friend David Conroyd for many reason but most recently because he informed us that there are Union Pacific Big Boys on display closer to us than Scranton as I had mentioned previously. In fact....there is a Big Boy only three hours away at the Museum of Transportation in St. Louis!! Leo is beside himself with excitement....we have already reserved a hotel in a few weeks and will make it an overnight trip....never thought I'd look forward to spending a night in a hotel with a five year old and seven year old and going to look at trains....
Right now we're off to my parents to finish unpacking them. My father starts adult daycare tomorrow. Cross your fingers. I think my mother is terrified of being alone. Of course one of the reasons we did this was so she would have some time not to worry but I don't know if she's seeing it that way at this point.....one day at a time I guess....
Now if I could only stop feeling fleas everywhere on me.......
Remember my flooded basement? Well, it's down to just slightly soggy but gee....look....here's our weather forecast for this evening:
Showers and thunderstorms likely in the evening...then scattered showers and thunderstorms after midnight. Some storms may produce heavy rainfall in the evening. Lows in the upper 60s. Light west winds. Chance of precipitation 60 percent.
And here's the forecast for tomorrow:
Showers and thunderstorms. Highs in the upper 70s. Light south winds becoming northeast in the afternoon. Chance of precipitation 80 percent.
and here's our current radar (we're at the little plus sign southeast of Danville):
sigh. I wonder if we should move the litter boxes upstairs? Leo's not going to like having his trains marooned on an island either....
As I was happily sitting here watching it rain outside as I worked.....Ernie called and said our basement was flooding......sigh. We were not blessed with the most wonderful of basements....it doesn't happen too often but when it does, it's not pretty.....
awww. shit.
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